Attorney General, Matt Gaetz: Just resigned from the House to block the release of a damning report from the Ethics Committee, which was investigating him for sexual misconduct, including statutory rape. Accused by House Republican colleagues of showing them naked pictures of his sexual conquests and of boasting of participating in drug and sex parties. Background includes a prior arrest for DWI and his bar license being temporarily suspended in 2021 for failure to pay fees.
Director of National Intelligence, Tulsi Gabbard: Secretly met with Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad in 2017 and blamed the U.S. and NATO for Russia’s invasion of Ukraine in 2022. Frequently quoted on Russian TV for supporting Putin’s war against Ukraine. Her pro-Russian stances include suggesting that the media in Russia is as free as the media in the United States.
Secretary of Defense, Pete Hegseth: Lobbied Trump to pardon U.S. service members accused of war crimes (that included murder) and has argued women should not serve in combat roles. Claimed Democrats made up Covid variants. Military experience is primarily in the reserves, where in over 20 years of service he advanced to the rank of Major, not Major General mind you, just Major. Hegseth’s request to join 25,000 National Guard troops to protect Biden’s inauguration was denied because he was one of 12 soldiers linked to right-wing militia groups, or found to have posted extremist views online and tattoos. He would later lie to the media about the reason for his dismissal. His primary job has been as one of the most MAGA Fox News hosts.
Hegseth has been twice divorced with his infidelity cited as the basis for both. It should be noted that adultery is a criminal offense in the military.
Update: In October 2017 police were called when a woman accused him of sexual assault at California Federation of Women Conference. No charges were filed but the existence of the charge has caught the Trump team by surprise.
From Major to Secretary of Defense is one Helluva promotion.
Head of the Department of Health & Human Services, Robert F. Kennedy Jr: An anti-vaxer who has compared vaccines to the holocaust and Dr. Fauci to Hitler. RFK has no medical degree (he has a degree in law). He was recorded as saying that Covid was ethnically targeted as evidenced by certain Jews supposedly being immune. He has claimed that chemicals in water are turning people gay and/or trans. He claimed, in court even that: “a worm that got into my brain and ate a portion of it and then died.” When asked about a former babysitter for his children accusing him of sexual assault, he responded: “I am not a church boy . . . I have so many skeletons in my closet that if they could all vote, I could run for king of the world.” He did not specifically deny the allegation. Other weird stories about him include his boasting of dumping a bear body in Central Park and his daughter describing him beheading a beached whale with a chainsaw.
This is the man Trump will entrust the health of the nation to, and place in charge of a budget larger than the Department of Defense.
Secretary Department of Homeland Security, Kristi Noem: The South Dakota (not exactly a border state) governor is perhaps best known to Americans for bragging in her autobiography about shooting the family’s pet dog, Cricket, in the face. She then took the family’s pet goat to the same gravel (killing) pit and killed it. Noem is unique amongst governors as she is banned from nearly 20% of her own state. Every Native American tribe in the state has banned her from tribal lands because she claims, without offering any evidence, that tribal leaders are involved in drug cartels. Originally a college dropout, Noem eventually earned a B.S. in Political Science from South Dakota State University with much of the coursework by correspondence. She has no experience that would qualify her to protect this nation from terrorism, but has taken a Trumpy line against immigration, so there you go.
Note: I will update this story as more clowns emerge from the car.
