American Press International (An API Exclusive Report).
API has learned that David Dennison, a man who is as much ego as he is alter ego to Donald Trump, has formally announced his candidacy for President of the United States. In an exclusive interview with API Mr. Dennison emphasized that his prior experience as an alias for the current President of the United States gave him all the background he needed to be leader of the free world.
“I’m the most qualified person to be President you will ever meet, believe me” said the Presidential porn star Hush Agreement pseudonym. “With me you know who and what you are getting, just like I did when I got Stormy Daniels.”
Dennison pledged to be just like Trump, only more so. Bigger walls that Mexico will pay double for. Travel bans enforced by sharks. “I’m afraid of sharks,” said Dennison, “so I am sure the very, very bad guys are too.” Dennison also said, “For all you guys out there, you known you want to be like me, nailing porn queens. Well you can’t, but you can vote for me.” Overall, Dennison promised to “be just like Trump, only not as restrained by actually being Trump.”
One thing Dennison promised to do is fire Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller. “Trump can’t get away with it, but I can,” he said with a devilishly orange grin.
Dennison gave API an exclusive sneak preview at his first campaign logo and slogan.