“The Greatest Texas A&M Football Fraud Ever!”

For my fellow Texas Aggies upset at last night’s loss to Arkansas, don’t worry, Trump’s got this. A forensic audit, already ordered by the Texas Governor, will find the Aggies won. The scoreboard has been subpoenaed and a hand recount of touchdowns is already underway.

As various random drunk Aggie fans have already pointed out, the Aggies were the 7th ranked team in the nation, Arkansas only 16th. The Aggies were the #1 ranked defense in the nation. Clearly, the only way the Aggies could lose this game was if there was massive football fraud and it was rigged. How could such a magnificent team lose to (literally) pigs? The only way was if it were rigged.

Also the Aggie Band won halftime, it always wins halftime. You going to tell me a team that has a band perform like that is going to lose? Wake up sheeple!

Sure, the left wing media will say that we saw it all happen on live TV, as if CBS Sports isn’t part of the fake sports news media. Yes, we saw some video of some Aggies losing, but what about all the video we didn’t see? There was more than one camera covering the game and yet we saw video from only one at a time. The only possible explanation is that the missing video shows the Aggies won.

The so-called “video” shows Texas A&M’s Isiah Spiller easily running for a 67 yard touchdown. You have to be an idiot to believe that was the only one. The “video” also shows that Spiller never touched the ball again after that play. Nobody can possibly believe that’s true, nobody.

Perhaps a few Aggies will be trotted out who will say they were at the game and saw the Aggies lose. These are TAINOs (Texas Aggies In Name Only) who are traitors to the Aggie Nation. They should be shunned, their Aggie Rings confiscated, and their names not read at Muster when they die. All real Aggies, who love Texas A&M, know the Aggies won.

Sure ESPN called the game for Arkansas, but the “S” in “ESPN” stands for “socialist.” Everyone knows that.

Finally, I wish to put to rest a vicious rumor against the Aggies that is going around. This lame stream media rumor is that the Aggie offensive line played the game absentee. This is false. Though their apparent lack of participation in the game is clear evidence of the fraud that will soon be revealed.

We don’t know what the actual score was, but the truth will come out, and when it does the Aggies will have won, and won by a lot. Bank on it!

Retired lawyer & Army vet in The Villages of Florida. Lifelong: Republican (pre-Trump), Constitution buff, science nerd & dog lover. Twitter: @KeithDB80